But more wonderful than the lore of old men and the lore of books is the secret lore of ocean. - Lovecraft

the wave
Originally uploaded by bill dwyer

Wednesday night we took E up to Popham to spend a few days with my mom at a cottage she is renting there. He's told us steadfastly for days that he doesn't want to go, but he's a kid that has trouble with change and spending days on that beach is one of my favorite childhood memories, so our hope was that he'd like it once he got there.

There has been terrible (and totally natural) beach erosion at Popham Beach State Park in the past couple of years (Very interesting MPBN piece on the how's and why's of this) but the "private" part of the beach is untouched. However, the beach is empty. EMPTY. My mom says she's probably seen less than 100 people enjoying the beach for the entire week she's been there (including last weekend). Which is sad, but also kind of good from a "hey I get to play on this wide open beach" perspective.

Over the past two days I think I've done well. I called her five times yesterday but only once today. It was a rainy day yesterday, so they did rainy day things (like visit the fort). Today, however, is glorious and my mom says she has trouble getting him out of the water. Josh and I went to dinner with friends last night and will again tonight. Our house is achingly empty without the E there - in some ways its like a time warp, just Josh and I together, but there is an astonishingly large hole in our lives without The Little Boy.

I have to admit that there is a growing part of me that thinks its important that E had this time at the ocean, and I'm praying he remembers it. Because I'm not convinced that a year from now the ocean will still be swimable. Or five years, even.